I actually went to a Book Club!!! Well, we went out for dessert at the Cheesecake Factory afterwards and I'm moving away from these wonderful women so I really wanted to spend some time with them while I could. Looks like I was the benefactor.
We talked about two books that were about Emma Smith. One was, Emma Smith: An Elect Lady by Susan Easton Black and the other that was brought up was Judge Me, Dear Reader by Erwin Wirkus. We had a wonderful discussion on the two books and on Joseph and Emma Smith and their challenges and on what became of Emma after Joseph was killed in Carthage.
Emma, was a strong willed and upright woman and very well educated for the time. She remarried a rough man who was a womanizer and was abusive-the opposite of Joseph. She stayed in Nauvoo after all of the saints were driven out or left to travel west for religious freedoms.
There are a lot of recorded instances where she was very mean and angry and spiteful towards others. She made some very questionable life decisions. Anyway, I thought quite a bit out all of this but I still don't want to judge her too harshly. She faced a lot of very very hard circumstances that could have contributed to her bitterness.
No matter what her life's outcome, I thought long and hard about a quote that came from one of the books.
It reads:
"Brigham Young was absolutely correct in his statement, because Joseph would find her in the hell that she had created for herself, and I firmly believe that, because of his love for her, he would redeem her from that state. I have real sympathy for Emma and see her as a person who became burned-out mentally and therefore spiritually. I believe that she suffered a severe mental breakdown when she saw her dead husband. We must also remember that she had asked Joseph to come back to Nauvoo even though he had said that if he were to return and stand trial he would be killed or 'he was not a prophet of God'."
The thought that really hit me was " in the hell that she had created for herself". I think we all create our own "hells" in this life. We are mean to people, maybe we covet another person, or we put our own wants before the needs of others, or maybe we are even overly judgemental, or we feel the need to be better than everyone, or need attention on a regular basis so we back bite or act innocent while backing up some terrible power struggles, etc. etc. etc. Hell is all about having regrets and living in the sadness of those thoughts. Hell is not forgiving. Hell is not loving unconditionally. Hell is not being loved and not knowing why and wanting it so badly. Hell is not having faith.
Regrets, regrets, regrets.
It kind of backs up another interesting idea someone shared on a program talking about out of body experiences where certain people had died and come back and spoke about it. One guy said that after his spirit left his body he was bombarded by a constant barrage from people who he had hurt or disappointed. They would come at him with questions of why. That stuck in my head at the time as quite possibly more of what I would have thought hell to be like. No rest just sadness and regrets and anxiety.
So, my question is,
do we really want to live in hell?
Then why create it?
Forgive.
Love.
Have faith.
Live a life with ALL of these qualities.
Could it be this simple?
It looks like we get to chose . . .
heaven
or
hell.
Monday, June 23, 2008
Sunday, June 22, 2008
The Baptist Preacher
A day or two ago I had a Baptist Preacher come to my door with a youth from his church. He started chatting with my 17 yr old son about going to heaven and about some Christian ideas. I came to the door and greeted this seemingly nice man from Arkansas. We had some very nice thoughts shared but being that I am in the middle of a huge move, I shared that I wasn't interested in coming to his church but that I appreciated our visit and wished him to have a nice day. He proceeded to tell me that he didn't care if I wanted to come to his church and then asked another question of me quizzing my knowledge of the Bible, specifically the New Testament. At this point I asked, "Are you really going to hold me up from what I am doing to banter with me about the Bible?" He said, "No" and kept it up.
I had to shut the door on him, sadly enough. And as I walked back to packing up our home and taking care of our family, I thought, for a preacher he sure did a couple Non-Christlike things by telling a lie about the fact that he didn't care if I wanted to come to his church (or he would have left on the higher note we had been on). And becoming aggressive in his questions on points that he knew we would differ on. And not being kind and respectful to me and my family during an obviously stressful time.
How many times do we contribute to the internal conflicts that those we go to church with have? How many times are we really just looking out for our own agenda and not applying actual Christ-like behaviors in our lives?
How many times are we more interested in a certain result than the others our actions might affect.
Are we more interested in getting a calling or assignment for the attention it would bring us over the great opportunity it might bring for us to serve others or achieve personal growth?
Now don't get me wrong. As responsible, intelligent people we are responsible for our own emotions and reactions to everything in our lives. I'm not giving an out to anyone.
But don't we have to take the time to consider our own actions and how that affects the world around us.
Consider this:
8 For they saw and beheld with great sorrow that the people of the church began to be lifted up in the pride of their eyes, and to set their hearts upon riches and upon the vain things of the world, that they began to be scornful, one towards another, and they began to persecute those that did not believe according to their own will and pleasure.
9 And thus, in this eighth year of the reign of the judges, there began to be great contentions among the people of the church; yea, there were envyings, and strife, and malice, and persecutions, and pride, even to exceed the pride of those who did not belong to the church of God.
10 And thus ended the eighth year of the reign of the judges; and the wickedness of the church was a great stumbling-block to those who did not belong to the church; and thus the church began to fail in its progress.
11 And it came to pass in the *commencement of the ninth year, Alma saw the wickedness of the church, and he saw also that the example of the church began to lead those who were unbelievers on from one piece of iniquity to another, thus bringing on the destruction of the people.
12 Yea, he saw great inequality among the people, some lifting themselves up with their pride, despising others, turning their backs upon the needy and the naked and those who were hungry, and those who were athirst, and those who were sick and afflicted. (Alma 4:8-10)
Look at verse 8! In the church people began to be hard on each other because some had less than them-not quite the right shoes, hat, dress, tie, calling, set of scriptures, hairdo, etc. You don't think that has an effect on the flow of the good things that can be done? Are you kidding? Do you think that you are building up those around you? Or are you assisting Satan in bringing misery into the lives of others? It's your test. You know your score. And yes, there is a score.
In our ward when one of my daughter's fellow classmates found out that her father was going to be in the Bishopric, it was said that she stated, "Good, now the Bishop with know how bad Lauren is." Abuse of power? yes. Painful for my daughter? yes. A stumbling block for Lauren? More of a refiner's fire. See, I've taught my kids that they have to learn from these kinds of things that happen all of their lives.
How does this look to others outside of the church or group? Well, they sure don't want to be a part of that kind of drama, now, do they? If they do, aren't you worried? I'd be.
BUT we can all fix the problemsand work towards better days fairly easily, if we chose. We can be more patient and tolarant not just on the surface but for real. We can be supportive and kind and listen. Do we REALLY need to be better than someone else at church? Why? What's the reward for that? If you need a medal work towards the Olympics or your local City League Tournament. There's real competition and politics. Enjoy.
The greatest reward we will ever get is the peace that comes with being sincere in our efforts to respect each other equally and in getting along in all circumstances.
Want to know how? There are a lot of great books to chose from. I'd start with the scriptures and go from there, personally. But because I'm a work in progress, I'll defer to other's with more wisdom and experience.
I had to shut the door on him, sadly enough. And as I walked back to packing up our home and taking care of our family, I thought, for a preacher he sure did a couple Non-Christlike things by telling a lie about the fact that he didn't care if I wanted to come to his church (or he would have left on the higher note we had been on). And becoming aggressive in his questions on points that he knew we would differ on. And not being kind and respectful to me and my family during an obviously stressful time.
How many times do we contribute to the internal conflicts that those we go to church with have? How many times are we really just looking out for our own agenda and not applying actual Christ-like behaviors in our lives?
How many times are we more interested in a certain result than the others our actions might affect.
Are we more interested in getting a calling or assignment for the attention it would bring us over the great opportunity it might bring for us to serve others or achieve personal growth?
Now don't get me wrong. As responsible, intelligent people we are responsible for our own emotions and reactions to everything in our lives. I'm not giving an out to anyone.
But don't we have to take the time to consider our own actions and how that affects the world around us.
Consider this:
8 For they saw and beheld with great sorrow that the people of the church began to be lifted up in the pride of their eyes, and to set their hearts upon riches and upon the vain things of the world, that they began to be scornful, one towards another, and they began to persecute those that did not believe according to their own will and pleasure.
9 And thus, in this eighth year of the reign of the judges, there began to be great contentions among the people of the church; yea, there were envyings, and strife, and malice, and persecutions, and pride, even to exceed the pride of those who did not belong to the church of God.
10 And thus ended the eighth year of the reign of the judges; and the wickedness of the church was a great stumbling-block to those who did not belong to the church; and thus the church began to fail in its progress.
11 And it came to pass in the *commencement of the ninth year, Alma saw the wickedness of the church, and he saw also that the example of the church began to lead those who were unbelievers on from one piece of iniquity to another, thus bringing on the destruction of the people.
12 Yea, he saw great inequality among the people, some lifting themselves up with their pride, despising others, turning their backs upon the needy and the naked and those who were hungry, and those who were athirst, and those who were sick and afflicted. (Alma 4:8-10)
Look at verse 8! In the church people began to be hard on each other because some had less than them-not quite the right shoes, hat, dress, tie, calling, set of scriptures, hairdo, etc. You don't think that has an effect on the flow of the good things that can be done? Are you kidding? Do you think that you are building up those around you? Or are you assisting Satan in bringing misery into the lives of others? It's your test. You know your score. And yes, there is a score.
In our ward when one of my daughter's fellow classmates found out that her father was going to be in the Bishopric, it was said that she stated, "Good, now the Bishop with know how bad Lauren is." Abuse of power? yes. Painful for my daughter? yes. A stumbling block for Lauren? More of a refiner's fire. See, I've taught my kids that they have to learn from these kinds of things that happen all of their lives.
How does this look to others outside of the church or group? Well, they sure don't want to be a part of that kind of drama, now, do they? If they do, aren't you worried? I'd be.
BUT we can all fix the problemsand work towards better days fairly easily, if we chose. We can be more patient and tolarant not just on the surface but for real. We can be supportive and kind and listen. Do we REALLY need to be better than someone else at church? Why? What's the reward for that? If you need a medal work towards the Olympics or your local City League Tournament. There's real competition and politics. Enjoy.
The greatest reward we will ever get is the peace that comes with being sincere in our efforts to respect each other equally and in getting along in all circumstances.
Want to know how? There are a lot of great books to chose from. I'd start with the scriptures and go from there, personally. But because I'm a work in progress, I'll defer to other's with more wisdom and experience.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
On this Father's Day
Many times in our lives we are blessed with great people. These people are not great because they have great powers, or have great wealth, or have numerous powerful contacts. These people are great because in their lives they contribute to our lives in positive, constructive ways. They are great because they become people we can trust and relate to. And maybe best of all, they are great because we can learn from them.
I have been blessed with a great Father.
My Father is a great listener.
My Father is a great learner.
My Father is a great teacher.
My Father is a great supporter.
My Father is a great friend.
My Father has assisted me in making changes in my life that have shaped my life into a more fulfilling process. He has not pushed or pulled. He has lightly suggested when asked. He has followed his heart in what he talks about and how he discusses things. He has never let me off the hook when I have been wrong yet he has never condemned me for my own foibles. He is ok with my pace of learning and applying knowledge.
I know that my Father will always want what is best for me not what he thinks I should be.
THAT is why I can trust him and why I say with all sincerity he really is my friend.
I love you with all of my heart, Dad.
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